I have been working in Corporate America for far too long. My soul has long since been compromised.
I cannot remember the last time my mother asked me to come visit and I did not do a quick cost analysis in my head, weighing the price of fuel and time against the perceived value of her company.
When my family tries to decide over a casket for my deceased grandmother, I inquire as to which model is the most “cost effective.”
When they look at me funny and accuse me with their scornful eyes of being insensitive, I remind them that given the rapture and the resurrection and all that other eschatology shit, there is no “return on investment (ROI)” in said purchase.
In the end, you’re just paying an excessive sum of capital to bury a Cadillac beneath topsoil.